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Parenting with Gary & Anne Marie: Toddlers

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Let Children Play

It is almost startling to realize just how important play is to a child's emotional, moral, and social development. Play is not simply an activity that a child wants to absorb himself in, but is a necessary framework for understanding his world. Play, whether a child does it by himself, in a small group, or with Mom at the park, is one of the most underestimated and often misunderstood components of a preschooler's healthy developing cognitive world.

Play involves many facets and connects children to life in many ways. But this too can be taken to an extreme with the old adage "If a little is good, more must be better." Play is not an isolated experience in a child's life, but only one significant component surrounded by other aspects of education. Not all education comes in the form of play. A child will learn from playing with a toy. More important, he must develop specific skills that he can gain only at the hands of Mom and Dad. Sitting, focusing, and concentrating skills are not play, but they are necessary skills for life. While following instructions and being kind, fair, and honest will be used in play, they are not necessarily learned there. The process of learning these skills starts with Mom and Dad's acute awareness that a three-year-old heart needs training to think about the feelings of others first.

Play creates learning opportunities and experiences that uniquely connect a child to his world that otherwise could not be obtained. Through play a child is first introduced to problem-solving techniques, development of moral and social skills, and improved motor coordination, logic, reasoning, and strategy. In addition, play has educational value and provides therapeutic benefits. Play complements and reinforces gender identification and encourages appropriate risk-taking. Overall, play is the single most important means by which a child connects with his world and the people around him. Think of play as the hub on a wagon wheel. Moving from the center outward, spokes connect to the outer rim of life and learning. Play generates multiple activities that go into shaping the child, reinforcing values, and stimulating learning.

Everything about play accents a child's understanding of his world. From right and wrong to parental expectations, play reveals in a public way how a child thinks, reasons, and applies concepts learned the day before. Through his imaginative play, he mimics actions, traits, and social expectations by becoming another person, and in this way he gains the experience of self-confidence necessary for proper socialization. By denying a child opportunity to play, a parent is in grave danger of collapsing the bridge connecting a preschooler's discovery, knowledge, and experience to learning.

Article by Gary Ezzo / Anne Marie Ezzo