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Parenting
with Gary & Anne Marie: Toddlers
Understanding Toddlers
Let's face it. There is
no end to a toddler's creative expression, from munching on crayons to striking
a Superman pose while standing-oh yes-on the grocery cart seat when your head
is turned to the artichoke bin. A toddler's day covers the gamut of challenges,
including small tantrums in the pizza shop because the cheese is bubbled and
tantrums at naptime because he is just too tired to rationalize the benefits
of sleep. But there is a tender side to the same child.
Watching a wide-eyed toddler
smile as Mom gently blows the tuft of silky white hair from spring's last dandelion,
followed by a spontaneous clap of little hands, bears witness to the amazing
reservoir of joy this child brings. A toddler takes his mother's hand and pulls
her toward the toy box because he remembers the pleasure of yesterday's play
and wants to share the moment with Mom. When little hands pull a face close
to touch noses or land a kiss, a world of turmoil comes under the spell of his
accents of love. All is at peace. The power of a toddler's embrace, the joy
of his smile, the comfort of his cuddling-all teach us about a simple love that
is pure and unmeasured.
As educators, parents, and
grandparents, we know of no greater fulfillment than the upturned face of a
child, eyes speaking wonders and a face full of confidence in discovering the
world with you. This is what makes parenting the most interesting subject in
the world. In just over a year, the helpless infant emerges as a little moving,
talking, walking, exploring person marked by keen senses, clear memory, quick
perceptions, and unlimited energy. He steps into a period of life known affectionately
as the "Toddler Years."
No other influence can affect
the life of your child quite like a loving, caring parent can. Parents matter
greatly in the life-formation of children. The more parents can understand about
toddlers, the better equipped they are for the nurturing process. The emerging
toddler has his own peculiar way. He thinks in the here and now, with no tomorrow
in sight. He is not easily moved to self-restraint or control in order to secure
future blessings. "A penny saved is a penny earned" is quite beyond
his grasp and interest. And all his peers would agree that crying over spilled
milk is essential if you're really thirsty-you'll get milk faster that way!
Your toddler will first
be concerned with the concrete, not the abstract. Moral qualities such as justice,
mercy, and truth are quite beyond his reach, but he does understand these qualities
when expressed toward him. His actions and developing speech reflect his self-oriented
desires rather than socialized values that will change in a few years.
Clearly, the adult life,
while distinct from childhood and adolescence, is wholly built upon the foundation
of the early training that parents put into their children. It is important
to see that a child is adequately prepared from the beginning for safe arrival
at the many stations of life, which starts with you understanding the little
person under your roof.
What goes into making a
toddler a person? There are a variety of influences, including things you cannot
control (nature, heredity, temperament, gender dispositions) and those influences
shaped by your beliefs (nurture, environment, education, values, goals).
But there is also the natural
order of growth and development in humans, which brings new and changing variables
into play. As the child's body grows, so grows his mind-and so grows his interplay
with the rest of humanity. These factors come together and make up the human
quality of our being.
Article
by Gary Ezzo / Anne Marie Ezzo
