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Parenting
with Gary & Anne Marie: Preschool
Developmental Placement and Matters of School Choice
Contributed by Robyn Vander
Weide
Looking back at when that
little infant was first placed in your arms, who would have dreamed that getting
him educated would be such a major ordeal? It seemed simple enough-put him on
the big yellow bus to school, where he spends several hours a day, until the
little guy wiggles back in the door with a head full of ABC's and a snack time
tale about Bobby's cracker creation. Yet somewhere along the line, it gets complicated
because suddenly you realize that there's quite a bit at stake here. As a result,
a little bit of panic sets in.
In this series, we discussed
at length how to prepare your child for school and how to make sure he starts
school when he is truly ready. No conversation about education would be complete
without some focus on Mom and Dad's perspectives on education or, more accurately,
keeping your child's education in perspective. The principles that follow may
seem very basic, and that's because they are. They are common-sense reminders
that should help you stay focused on the main thing-raising a morally responsible
and academically assertive child who will successfully integrate his life into
society for the benefit of all. Let's get started with our first educational
truism.
There Isn't One Choice
That Is Best or Right for Everyone
This applies to almost every aspect of education. For instance: public school,
private school, religious school, homeschool? Each has merit, and one will fit
your situation better than the others. You may not make the same choice as other
relatives or friends. That doesn't make the choice right or wrong, good or bad.
Make your choices based on your child's needs and what venue of learning can
best facilitate your family and parenting goals.
Fallacious is the reasoning that says there is only one way or place for a child
to be educated. Don't be swayed by peer pressure, because what may be good for
your neighbor's child may not be good for you.
When it comes to selecting
the best choice in education, the first consideration on the minds of many parents
today is the and safety. Because of the tragedies over the last decade in several
of America's public schools, many parents are considering private schools as
an alternative venue for educating their children. But private schools can be
expensive, and they're not right for every child or family. If your child goes
to a private school, he may have to forgo extracurricular activities, including
organized sports, band, or choir, which are common in public schools. On the
other hand, the student-to-teacher ratios are usually better at private schools,
and teachers can give more attention to character training and less attention
to political correctness in the classroom.
Homeschooling is another
option to consider. This movement, once popular primarily among Evangelical
Christians, has now become quite fashionable in the mainstream culture. However,
as with private schools, homeschooling isn't for everyone. It's plenty of work
for parents, not all of whom feel they can adequately teach their children,
especially at the high school level.
The good news is that this
doesn't have to be a once-for-all decision. It's sometimes a good idea to try
all three. For example, homeschool until age seven, private school through ninth
grade, then public school until graduation, or some other arrangement. Keep
tinkering with your options until you find what's right for your child and family.
Evaluate it each year and don't be afraid to entertain a different school option
than that of your neighbor.
Choose Wisely
Whenever possible, take time to consider matters carefully before making decisions.
When choosing a school, it is important to walk the campus and observe the students.
What is the atmosphere? Do you like how the students are relating to each other
and to adults? Interview the principal. What is the school's philosophy of education,
and how is it being carried out? Are there special programs offered that interest
you? You may want to observe in a classroom to help you make your decision.
You are looking for an environment in which your child will thrive.
Respect Authority
Teachers appreciate students and parents who are courteous and follow the rules.
Both you and your child will get the most out of every school experience if
you remember to treat others as you want to be treated. Most educators want
to help children and please parents. Make suggestions with a helpful attitude
rather than a critical spirit. Kindness is not something we teach our children
apart from example. Parents need to do their part in teaching respect to teachers.
Prepare Your Child for
the Road, Not the Road for Your Child
Disappointments happen. Don't try to adjust or manipulate every situation so
that your child will be successful. Instead, view each situation as a challenge
to be met. Learning to overcome challenges is an important life skill. Some
situations will really stretch your child, but usually that is when much growth
takes places. If you constantly try to step in and change what seems difficult,
your child may miss out on the opportunity to overcome and to achieve in ways
you never expected.
Change May Be Necessary
While it is important not to bail out of every difficult situation, sometimes
change is necessary. The change may be as small as where your child sits in
the class or as large as changing teachers or even schools. Sometimes no amount
of effort will solve a problem. No matter how many positive reasons you have
for staying in a particular school, if your child cannot thrive, it is time
for a change. Some changes are necessary for academic reasons. Some are necessary
for social reasons.
Article
by Gary Ezzo / Anne Marie Ezzo
